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Below are 20 journal entries, after skipping by the 20 most recent ones recorded in Satan's LiveJournal:

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Saturday, July 3rd, 2004
8:41 pm
What lies beyond the doors...
Passing through a set off double doors into a different world. A world of beauty and beyond imagination an invisible wall of protection holding back a lethal force. Look through the glass and see the wonder of a world brought from beneath the majestic sea. So many people can lose them self in the moment of awe looking at the crash on the surface. I lost myself in a moment of wonder walking down a hall under the sea. Your hand in mine a smile on your face a look of amazement and innocent joy. You point you gasp making sure I can enjoy every pleasure that comes into your view. You look through the window at the beauty of the fish brushing by unaware of the look of wonder your beauty holds for me. They say each second is a new experience for a fish who can not remember beyond the last. I look in your eyes the color of the water that surrounds us. If I could be a fish if even for a day your eyes would be the bowl I would want to experience anew every moment of the day. A world filled with wonder through a set of double doors luckily for me my world of wonder holds me close as we walk though them out into the light.
Monday, June 21st, 2004
6:51 pm
I run to you for comfort when you walk in the door
I am afraid to let go of your hand when we walk down the street
I trip and look at you in fear hoping you will help me up
You help me up and brush me off with gentle hands
They’re for me in my time of need to wipe away my tears

Later we go home to eat my favorite dish
You ask me gently and oh so nicely to clear away the grime
A smash a crash a scream of fright
My eyes meet yours waiting for the moment
You laugh and smile and help me find the pieces


Story time sweet story time my world among the clouds
I zoom, I honk, I shake hands with Dr Seuss
My eyes slowly close as I fight against the weight
I know what comes in the middle of the night
The closet door is closed my night-light shining bright
None of this a shield against what comes in the middle of the night

A bang a shout I know I have lost the fight
Somewhere some how my eyes had lost there sight
The world among the clouds vanishes from my thoughts
A world of thunder clouds and lightning

Quick think fast what can I do, where can I go?
Thought ends with a crack no room to think no time to run
Standing in the door the thing that comes in the night
What does he know?
The dish, my Pants?
Does it really matter in the end the creature never cares

Why oh why I ask myself am I so bad
Why can the hand that starts to reach for me be not a fist to strike?
The person I once looked up and smiled when I saw
His name upon my lips my great and glorious DAD
6:50 pm
Paint the sky in pale pink and gray-blue
Paint houses and trees on the far shore
And a few seagulls off to the left
Playing tag with the waves
Paint two people standing on the rocks
Their arms around each other, talking
The wind is tugging at them
And water and foam is beating the stones they stand on
Then paint happiness in their eyes
Red fingertips, ears, nose and toe
Paint a seaweed scuff on her jeans
And his easy and sturdy stance
Paint her head on his shoulder
As they laugh and stare
Not caring about the past or present
Paint them smiling, in spite of the real world
Dreaming of just today
Tuesday, June 15th, 2004
1:23 pm
Fly free....
The silence no longer seems to echo through the room. I am no longer a victim of the unwilling bonds that seemed to hold my wings within. Soaring through the clouds slowly towards a destination I have yet to see. A destination that holds the wind that lifts me and the air that fills my lungs. I have fought through lightning and blizzard to reach this point. Sometimes I have been my own worst enemy in a fight I thought was futile. Only each time I have been about to fold my wings and let it end I have caught a sparkle of hope. A parting of the clouds leaking forth a glimmer of the light I had forgotten still existed. You are the light that I close my eyes and still see.
Monday, June 14th, 2004
4:10 pm
Slander!
razzberee keeps a hamster for nefarious purposes!
electricsoup once kept bombquita locked up in their basement for eight months.
meenk has the last piece of Aztec gold.
janie got elentaari drunk and naked, and took photos. janieee downloaded them.
janie, wndrwendy7 and bombquita are involved in a sordid love-triangle, with emilymarie totally unaware!
rachel has secret fantasies about George W. Bush...

Enter your username to dish the dirt on your friends!

Thursday, June 10th, 2004
11:44 am
Lack of understanding seems to be what I am best at.
Monday, June 7th, 2004
11:42 am
silence26's LJ stalker is bombquita!
bombquita is stalking you because they have you confused with someone else whom they love. They are also deluded!


LiveJournal Username:


LJ Stalker Finder
From Go-Quiz.com
Friday, May 28th, 2004
12:30 pm
A lost night
In a noisy crowded room I can hear the silence. Bouncing off the the walls in an endless echo of a fruitless search. Lights dance across the floor tumbling and turning. A surface that holds no face that brings me joy. Empty words move in tune to a dance I can't find the beat to. What class did others take to do it with such ease? Call it by a simple name that has no definition in my dictionary. What is this foreign word known as human interaction?
Tuesday, May 25th, 2004
9:38 pm
Love may not make the world go round.....
But it is what makes the ride worth living
Friday, May 21st, 2004
9:27 pm
Tuesday, May 11th, 2004
8:54 pm
Standing in the middle of a field close your eyes and tilt your face towards heaven. Some people feel the warmth of the sun upon their skin or the wind blowing quickly by. Others might hear the beauty of the song that nature plays around you. Many would see their dreams come true in the riches of the world. For me the closing of my eyes simply brings forth the image of a face. A face whose smile is the sun and eyes not even the twinkle of the stars can dim. A laugh that makes the songbirds jealous and voice that makes the world vanish around it. A dream is such a perfect thing it day or night and like a dream simply lasts a second then is gone. Sometimes when I am awake I hope to see my dream others I wonder if a dream really can exist. So with empty hand and open heart I reach forward with simple words upon my lips. Would it be too much to ask for you to be my dream if even just for tonight?
1:14 am
I run to you for comfort when you walk in the door
I am afraid to let go of your hand when we walk down the street
I trip and look at you in fear hoping you will help me up
You help me up and brush me off with gentle hands
They’re for me in my time of need to wipe away my tears

Later we go home to eat my favorite dish
You ask me gently and oh so nicely to clear away the grime
A smash a crash a scream of fright
My eyes meet yours waiting for the moment
You laugh and smile and help me find the pieces


Story time sweet story time my world among the clouds
I zoom, I honk, I shake hands with Dr Seuss
My eyes slowly close as I fight against the weight
I know what comes in the middle of the night
The closet door is closed my night-light shining bright
None of this a shield against what comes in the middle of the night

A bang a shout I know I have lost the fight
Somewhere some how my eyes had lost there sight
The world among the clouds vanishes from my thoughts
A world of thunder clouds and lightning

Quick think fast what can I do, where can I go?
Thought ends with a crack no room to think no time to run
Standing in the door the thing that comes in the night
What does he know?
The dish, my Pants?
Does it really matter in the end the creature never cares

Why oh why I ask myself am I so bad
Why can the hand that starts to reach for me be not a fist to strike?
The person I once looked up and smiled when I saw
His name upon my lips my great and glorious DAD
Thursday, May 6th, 2004
10:57 pm
Tiny little fingers that barely close around the smallest object. Arms the move all about and sounds with no meaning other then the noise they make. Ears that our so innocent to have never heard pain or happiness. The possibility of being anything this world has to offer from the greatest good to the most terrible evil. All the same such potential in one little face in one toothless smile. A world that is all new and each breath a new experience and each corner a miracle. A set of eyes never to feel this wonder a set of ear never to know sound. Hands failing to grasp, feet never to kick just for the enjoyment of the movement. A life so pure never seen to let go of life before leaving his mothers arms. The pain we feel by living life that we want to push it away and let it go. The gift we have that will never be given at this baby shower.
Wednesday, May 5th, 2004
9:38 pm
Life is such a curious thing. We struggle we grasp we try to control. We lie we cheat we think we have won. We finally have it all in our hands. The control we have sought the perfect life we want. How few of us know the perfect life is a falsehood. The control we had such an illusion and the lie we told was to ourselves. Tiny little hands come into our lives turn it from one side to that and we smile all the more. Happiness is not control or the perfect life it is having those hands close to yours.
Saturday, May 1st, 2004
11:26 pm
Some people hold on to love until they strangle it to death
Tuesday, April 27th, 2004
1:58 pm
I dont pronounce my Rs I call a garbage can a barrel, a liquor store a packie, a water fountain a bubbla, a milkshake a frappe I root for a team who has not won a World Series since 1918 I say Larry Bird is the greatest basketball playa Ted Williams, the greatest hitta To me any place west of Rte 128 is the boonies & Cape Cod is a little piece of Heaven down here on Earth I ride on the T. I know betta than to swim in the Charles River but I do love that Dirty Water, I yell YANKEES SUCK when the Red Sox are playin the Tigers, Im a Bostonian...
Monday, April 26th, 2004
7:38 pm
Death is Morbid

Death is Grim

Death makes me wonder why I goto the gym
Sunday, April 25th, 2004
10:05 pm
Closing in....
Feel it roll feel it crackle. Your skin is tingling you hair on edge. You jump in fear your eyesight vanish if only for a moment. The world is changed its awesome power one caress a scar remains. Watch it play watch it dance who knows where it will reach to next. Randomness is your shield roll the dice wish for luck and hope you are not on the face. Such a feeling of utter power such a beauty you will touch only once. Sitting on a roof feeling the tumble and hearing the grumble. Watch as it moves closer the storm is all around hold on tight and maybe it will move on.
Saturday, April 24th, 2004
10:17 pm
A dictionary of confusion
Pretty words just a bunch of letters mashed all together in one. Ugly words are just the same not hidden behind a smile of pretense. Words can be like the caress of the most delicate flower or the slowly dying of thirst in the middle of a desert. Many scream run and protest the war. Others scream of gay marriage at the tops of there lungs. If there is anything to protest in the world it is words themselves. The greatest gift and the most unholy curse all put into a pretty package. A dictionary holds a hundred words for joy and five times as many for hatred. Mans biggest deceit of themselves was the first time a woman and man said hello.
9:28 pm
Bouncing questions
I wonder what did they mean by that? What were the words behind the words? Was the truth in there eyes when they spoke? Was that a smile or a smirk of contempt? Do they really want to be my friend or am I just a mean to an end? Every conversation we have every eye we meet questions bouncing in our head. Feel the doubt like a heavy blanket see the mask we wear of confidence even hiding behind our arrogant walk. We own the room when we walk in the spotlight of life is ours to direct. How shallow our confidence is in truth. We approach the door of happiness but are afraid to knock. What if they don't like us? What if every door we pass has a do not disturb sign on it? Why is it human nature to over thinks and questions everything? Live life, be happy, Stop asking question that can find no answer. Let you brain stop guiding and your heart lead the way. Maybe you tumble maybe you cry but happiness is behind a door your brain doesn’t have the key to.
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